🪦 Here Lies the Myth of Musk...

 

“Elon Musk, Billionaire Visionary, Born from Subsidies, Died from His Own Tweets.”

🪦 Here Lies the Myth of Musk...
A satirical obituary for the techno-messiah that never was.

Elon Musk is dead.
Not biologically (unfortunately for Twitter’s rate limits), but the myth — the larger-than-life narrative of a genius-billionaire-visionary — has finally croaked. Choked, rather poetically, on the fumes of his own hubris, bad investments, and dopamine-soaked edgelord tweets.
Let us bow our heads in mock solemnity for a man who once stood atop a mountain of government subsidies1 and had the audacity to call himself self-made. Whose empire of batteries, rockets, and memecoins was buoyed by the very state he claims to disdain. The free market never loved him; it merely tolerated him as a sideshow attraction until it found better memes.
Tesla stock teeters like a Jenga tower built during an earthquake2, SpaceX is a government contractor with rocket envy3, and Twitter—pardon, “X”—has devolved into a $44 billion bonfire4 where Musk cosplays as a free speech warrior while banning journalists5 and amplifying neo-Nazi accounts6. Poetic justice? More like justice with a blunt instrument and a flamethrower bought off Wish.com.
He was once a symbol of techno-optimism. Now he’s a cautionary tale with a vape addiction and a thinning reality distortion field.
And let’s not forget: the end didn’t come at the hands of critics or regulators. No, it came via death-by-ego, aided and abetted by fanboys who thought buying a Tesla made them smarter than economists. It came when Donald Trump publicly begged Elon not to abandon him7 — the ultimate boomer endorsement from the human embodiment of a foreclosure.
So now we gather to say goodbye to the idea of Elon Musk.
He didn’t pave the future. He paved over it with memes, layoffs8, and Mars fantasies designed to distract from labor violations and SEC filings9.
Ashes to Dogecoin.
Dust to NFTs.
May his next startup be a silent retreat.

Coming Soon:
“Trump’s Eulogy for Elon – ‘He Was One of the Good Billionaires, Not Like the Others Who Pay Taxes.’” 

📎 Sources / Citations

Footnotes
• "Elon Musk’s Companies Have Received an Estimated $4.9 Billion in Government Support" – Los Angeles Times, 2015
https://www.latimes.com/business/la-fi-hy-musk-subsidies-20150531-story.html ↩
• "Tesla Stock Has Lost $800 Billion Since Peak" – Forbes, March 2024
https://www.forbes.com/sites/greatspeculations/2024/03/01/tesla-has-lost-800-billion/ ↩
• "SpaceX's Revenues Are Heavily Dependent on Government Contracts" – CNBC, 2023
https://www.cnbc.com/2023/06/23/spacex-us-government-contracts.html ↩
• "Elon Musk Finalizes $44 Billion Twitter Deal, Fires Executives" – Reuters, October 2022
https://www.reuters.com/technology/musk-closes-44-billion-twitter-deal-fires-top-executives-2022-10-27/ ↩
• "Elon Musk Suspends Journalists from Twitter/X Over Location Reporting" – NPR, 2022
https://www.npr.org/2022/12/16/1143134561/twitter-elon-musk-journalist-ban ↩
• "Elon Musk's Twitter Boosted Far-Right Accounts and Hate Speech, Data Shows" – The Guardian, 2023
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2023/jan/23/twitter-hate-speech-research-elon-musk ↩
• "Trump Begged Elon Musk for Support Amid GOP Division" – Rolling Stone, March 2025
https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/trump-pleads-elon-musk-endorsement-2025-1234960930/ ↩
• "Tesla Lays Off Over 10,000 Employees Amid Financial Downturn" – Bloomberg, April 2025
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2025-04-04/tesla-job-cuts-elon-musk ↩
• "Tesla Under Investigation for False Reporting, Labor Violations" – New York Times, January 2025
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/01/20/business/tesla-labor-investigation.html ↩

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Death by Policy: How American Institutions Are Quietly Thinning the Herd

Image
Death by Policy: How American Institutions Are Quietly Thinning the Herd Introduction What if the greatest threat to your life wasn’t a natural disaster or a foreign enemy—but a bureaucratic decision buried in an NIH memo or a Medicaid proposal? From scientific research to healthcare access, a coordinated erosion of public good is underway. It’s slow, procedural, and written in the language of oversight and efficiency. But the outcome is unmistakable: fewer people survive. This isn’t dysfunction. It’s design. And the people who survive it? That’s no accident either. 1. NIH Subawards: Cutting the Lifeline of Global Science In May 2025, the National Institutes of Health announced that foreign institutions would no longer be eligible for subawards through U.S.-based research grants. For the layperson, this sounds like a small administrative tweak. In reality, it’s an act of scientific isolationism that endangers lives. Subawards are how research projects work across borders. A U.S....
Read more

Title: When a President Defies the Court — and Laughs About It

Image
The Trump White House didn’t just violate a federal court order — they bragged about it. On April 17, the official @WhiteHouse account mocked a New York Times headline about a man wrongly deported under Trump’s immigration policies. The man — Kilmar Abrego Garcia — had a valid asylum claim, but the administration deported him anyway, in defiance of judicial rulings. Then came the tweet. “Fixed it for you, @NYTimes,” the account posted, crossing out “wrongly deported” and replacing it with “MS-13 ILLEGAL ALIEN.” Then, the kicker: “@ChrisVanHollen — he’s NOT coming back.” This isn’t just cruel. It’s authoritarian. The Trump administration is openly thumbing its nose at the rule of law. They're ignoring judicial orders, violating constitutional norms, and doing so with public glee . They aren't hiding their contempt — they’re turning it into content. When the White House uses its platform not to explain policy but to mock a federal judge’s ruling, that’s not spin — that’s...
Read more